Business may pass on taxes.
-- Stanley F. Reed
Only little people pay taxes.
--Leona Helmsley (attributed)
Never let the tax tail wag the economic dog.
--Laura Peebles
An Englishman's home is his tax haven.
--Economist Magazine
There can be no taxation without misrepresentation.
--J.B. Handelsman
An economy breathes through its tax loopholes.
--Barry Bracewell-Milnes
Today is the first day of the rest of your taxable year.
--Jeffery L. Yablon
We have a tax code that favors those with the best accountants.
--Shane Keats
The avoidance of tax may be lawful, but it is not yet a virtue.
--Lord Denning
If you don't drink, smoke, or drive a car, you're a tax evader.
--Thomas S. Foley
It is sinful to deceive the government regarding taxes and duties.
--The Talmud
It is seldom given to mortal man to feel superior to a tax lawyer.
--Anthony C. Amsterdam
Who will protect the integrity of the tax law if the tax lawyers won't?
--Christopher Bergin
Sixty-four percent of women attorneys think that tax lawyers make undesirable dates.
--Daniel Dolan
The difference between tax avoidance and tax evasion is the thickness of a prison wall.
--Denis Healey
The many small stockholders cannot afford professional counsel or evasion devices.
--Robert H. Jackson
Just let 'em feel that you can save 'em something on taxes and nobody will keep you out.
--Warren Buffett
From a tax point of view you're better off raising horses or cattle than children.
--Patricia R. Schroeder
A dog who thinks he is man's best friend is a dog who obviously has never met a tax lawyer.
--Fran Lebowitz
Why shouldn't the American people take half my money from me? I took all of it from them.
--Edward A. Filene
The avoidance of taxes is the only intellectual pursuit that still carries any reward.
--John Maynard Keynes
It scarcely lies in the mouth of the taxpayer who plays with fire to complain of burnt fingers.
--Lord Greene
The First Rule of Practicing Tax Law: If someone has to go to jail, make sure it's the client.
--Fred Drasner
[Game Show Host:] You're a genius.
[Contestant:] No, I'm a tax attorney.
--Regis Philbin and Bill MacDonald
It's time we tell the bar associations and the IRS to shove their opinions up their cash cows.
--James Traficant
Those who have large estates and watchful lawyers will find ways of minimizing these tax burdens.
--Robert H. Jackson
Tax lawyers spend about a third of their time converting ordinary income into capital gain.
--Walter Blum (attributed)
[A] society which turns so many of its best and brightest into tax lawyers may be doing something wrong.
--Hoffman F. Fuller
[Headline:] Tax Planning May Be Futile
--Albert B. Crenshaw
Convenience of payment is important in helping to ensure compliance with the tax system. The more difficult a tax is to pay the more likely that it will not be paid.
--Tax Division of the American Institute of Certified Public Accountants
I don't suppose we will ever get to the point where people are pleased to pay taxes, but we owe it to them to see that the collection is done as efficiently as possible, as courteously as possible, and always honestly.
--Lyndon B. Johnson
The American compliance record stems from a combination of civic obligation, fear of audit, and confidence that everyone else on the block is chipping in. Remove any one of those, and you could quickly undermine the whole system.
--Fred Hiatt
If any person shall complain in court that payment has been unduly exacted of him or that he has sustained any arrogance and if he should be able to prove this fact, a severe sentence shall be pronounced against such tax collector.
-- Constantine
It is reasonable that a man who denies the legality of a tax should have a clear and certain remedy. . . . Courts sometimes, perhaps, have been a little too slow to recognize the implied duress under which payment is made.
--Oliver Wendell Holmes Jr.
No fact speaks so well for the loyalty of the American people, and in support of their determination to pay their debts as the readiness with which they submit [in late 1865] to the payment of war taxes in times of peace.
--The Nation Magazine
As a cop, the IRS has to balance customer service and law enforcement. Stated another way, the agency's motto could be: "We're your friend. But if you push that friendship too far, we'll ruin your life and then throw you in jail."
--Christopher Bergin
[New Mission Statement:] The IRS mission is to provide America 's taxpayers top quality service by helping them understand and meet their tax responsibilities and by applying the tax law with integrity and fairness to all.
--The Internal Revenue Service
A perfect revenue law, if improperly administered or resisted by a hostile public, will soon become a practical monstrosity; but an imperfect law, if wisely administered with a reasonable public, will produce very satisfactory results.
--Aubrey R. Marrs
Students of federal taxation agree that the tax system suffers from delay in getting the final word in judicial review, from retroactivity of the decision when it is obtained, and from the lack of a roundly tax-informed viewpoint of judges.
--Robert H. Jackson
Certain states are out-and-out aggressive. But in most, you can drive a Mack truck through the revenue department and no one will notice. They're often clueless about how to question our tax planning strategies and techniques.
--Anonymous Oil Company Tax Director
Unofficial Motto of the Internal Revenue Service: "We have what it takes to take what you have."
--Anonymous
Simplicity in modern taxation is a problem of basic architectural design. Present legislation is insufferably complicated and nearly unintelligible. If it is not simplified, half of the population may have to become tax lawyers and tax accountants.
--Henry C. Simons
Conflicts are multiplied by treating as questions of law what really are disputes over proper accounting. The mere number of such questions and the mass of decisions they call forth becomes a menace to the certainty and good administration of the law.
--Robert H. Jackson
An accountant once told me that the definition of fair market value for tax purposes is the value arrived at in negotiations between a willing tax lawyer and a willing revenue agent, neither of whom has ever bought or sold anything of consequence in his life.
--Paul H. Asofsky
The taxpayer-rights provisions of the Internal Revenue Code are like the civil-rights provisions of the former Soviet Union 's constitution. On paper, they tell a wonderful story. In practice, for many taxpayers there is no effective protection against government abuse.
--Bob Kamman
Every good citizen . . . should be willing to devote a brief time during some one day in the year, when necessary, to the making up of a listing of his income for taxes . . . to contribute to his Government, not the scriptural tithe, but a small percentage of his net profits.
--Cordell Hull
The tax farmer would advance money to the monarch -- the equivalent of planting his seeds -- and then go about collecting it from the citizenry -- the equivalent of gathering in a harvest whose ultimate value, as with all farmers, he hoped would exceed the cost of the seeds.
--Peter L. Bernstein
Dear Mr. President, Internal Revenue regulations will turn us into a nation of bookkeepers. The life of every citizen is becoming a business. This, it seems to me, is one of the worst interpretations of the meaning of human life history has ever seen. Man's life is not a business.
--Saul Bellow ("Herzog")
Never has it come to my attention or been part of my experience that a revenue agent, a tax collector, has put humanity above regulation. They are, again in my experience, the most abjectly humorless, dehumanized, order taking, weak-charactered, easily vicious, almost casually amoral people I have met.
--Karl Hess
The tax which each individual is bound to pay ought to be certain, and not arbitrary. The time of payment, the manner of payment, the quantity to be paid, ought all to be clear and plain to the contributor, and to every other person, so that the tax payer is not put in the power of the tax gatherer.
--Adam Smith
If Congress may tax one citizen to the point of discouragement for making an honest living, it is hard to say that it may not do the same to another just because he makes a sinister living. If the law-abiding must tell all to the tax collector, it is difficult to excuse one because his business is lawbreaking.
--Robert H. Jackson
I recently heard a CPA remark that the only accounting principle which the Internal Revenue Service regards as "generally accepted" is "A bird in the hand is worth two in the bush." Although my friend overstates his case a bit -- quite a bit -- I cannot dismiss the thrust of his comment without some soul searching.
--Sheldon S. Cohen
A tax . . . may obstruct the industry of the people, and discourage them from applying to certain branches of business which might give maintenance and employment to great multitudes. While it obliges the people to pay, it may thus diminish, or perhaps destroy, some of the funds which might enable them more easily to do so.
--Adam Smith
. . . I'm continually amazed at the attitude people have toward their tax refund. There seems to be in most people's minds -- and I'm talking about intelligent, educated people who understand the tax system -- a disconnect between the refund they get and the amount of taxes they pay. It's like a lottery. People want that check!
--Verenda Smith
If the IRS used only the maximization of yield approach, it would meet its goals of using its resources most effectively to yield the most revenue. The purpose, however, of the audit program, is not to produce the greatest revenue but to produce the greatest level of voluntary compliance . . . .
--IRS Commissioner's Advisory Group Study (1978)
In connection with the payment of taxes due, no person shall fear that he will suffer, at the hand of perverse and enraged judges, imprisonment, lashes of leaded whips, weights, or any other tortures devised by the arrogance of judges. Prisons are for criminals. . . . In accordance with this law, taxpayers shall proceed with security.
-- Constantine
It is the small owner who offers the only really profitable and reliable material for taxation. . . . He is made for taxation. . . . He swarms; he is far more tied to his place and his calling than the big owner; he has less skill, and ingenuity as regards escape; and he still has a large supply of "ignorant patience of taxation."
--Auberon Herbert
[Old Mission Statement:] The purpose of the Internal Revenue Service is to collect the proper amount of tax revenue at the least cost; serve the public by continually improving the quality of our products and services; and perform in a manner warranting the highest degree of public confidence in our integrity, efficiency and fairness.
--The Internal Revenue Service
One of the underlying problems is that too many of us think that tax policy is made at the National Office in Washington . The real tax policy is made by that auditing agent who is sitting in your client's office. He can miss issues that are screaming, or he can dig in on absurd issues, but it can be very expensive to get him back on the right track.
--Terence Floyd Cuff
We [Judges of the U.S. Tax Court] have from time-to-time complained about the complexity of our revenue laws and the almost impossible challenge they present to taxpayers or their representatives who have not been initiated into the mysteries of the convoluted, complex provisions affecting the particular corner of the law involved. . . . Our complaints have obviously fallen upon deaf ears.
-- Arnold Raum
You first have to decide whether to use the short or the long form. The short form is what the Internal Revenue Service calls "simplified," which means it is designed for people who need the help of a Sears tax preparation expert to distinguish between their first and last names. . . . The IRS wants you to use the short form because it gets to keep most of your money. So unless you have pond silt for brains, you want the long form.
--Dave Barry
If, as the rate of a particular duty is increased, the revenue yielded increases, the duty is predominantly a tax. But when the rate is increased above the point at which the yield in revenue is a maximum, it is clear that some element of penalty is present, and we finally reach a duty of prohibitive amount, whose yield is very small or non-existent. This is closely akin to a simple prohibition of production or importation, with a penalty for infraction.
--Hugh Dalton
The United States has a system of taxation by confession. That a people so numerous, scattered and individualistic annually assesses itself with a tax liability, often in highly burdensome amounts, is a reassuring sign of the stability and vitality of our system of self- government. What surprised me in once trying to help administer these laws was not to discover examples of recalcitrance, fraud or self- serving mistakes in reporting, but to discover that such derelictions were so few.
--Robert H. Jackson
The [Tax Court] is independent, and its neutrality is not clouded by prosecuting duties. Its procedures assure fair hearings. Its deliberations are evidenced by careful opinions. All guides to judgment available to judges are habitually consulted and respected. It has established a tradition of freedom from bias and pressures. It deals with a subject that is highly specialized and so complex as to be the despair of judges. It is relatively better staffed for its task than is the judiciary.
--Robert H. Jackson
This year, it is important for you to know that the Internal Revenue Service now has a positive, taxpayer-friendly image. What does this mean to you, the individual taxpayer? According to [the Head of the IRS] it means you are now expected to tip: "If you're a married taxpayer filing jointly, tucking a $50 bill inside your tax return will definitely cause the IRS employee serving you to feel appreciated and be less likely to select you for the auditing procedure we call 'The Closet Full of Snakes.'"
--Dave Barry
The high duties which have been imposed upon the importation of many different sorts of foreign goods, in order to discourage their consumption in Great Britain, have in many cases served only to encourage smuggling; and in all cases have reduced the revenue of the customs below what more moderate duties would have afforded. The saying of Dr. Swift, that in the arithmetic of the customs two and two, instead of making four, make sometimes only one, holds perfectly true with regard to such heavy duties.
--Adam Smith
I will tell you a secret, which I learned many years ago from the commissioners of the customs in London: They said, when any commodity appeared to be taxed above a moderate rate, the consequence was to lessen that branch of the revenue by one half; and one of those gentlemen pleasantly told me, that the mistake of Parliaments, on such occasions, was owing to an error in computing two and two to make four; whereas in the business of laying heavy impositions, two and two never make more than one; which happens by lessening the import, and the strong temptation of running such goods as paid high duties.
--Jonathan Swift
[The Head of the Internal Revenue Service] points out that when we sign our tax returns, we are in effect taking a legal oath. "This means," he sternly reminds us, "that the information you provide must meet the same standard of truth and accuracy that President Clinton met when he testified under oath about alleged acts of internship with Monica Lewinsky." For example, if you have three dependents, when you fill in the box that says "Number of Dependents," the following answers would meet the Clinton Accuracy Standard:
"Three."
"Four."
"Around twenty-seven."
"I don't recall."
"It depends what you mean by 'dependent.'"
--Dave Barry
In the time of Emperor Vespasian, the government provided urinals in the streets of Rome and charged a fee for their use. The emperor, seeking to reduce his budget deficit, decided to raise the fee. His son, a finicky fellow, asked the emperor whether the additional receipts should be considered a tax increase or a reduction of government expenditure for the provision of the facilities. To this the emperor made his famous reply (in Latin, the only language he spoke): "Non Olet!" The literal translation is, "It doesn't smell." But the meaning is, "It's all money, and it doesn't matter which side of the ledger you put it on."
--Herbert Stein
I want to begin by saying we have had good experience with the Internal Revenue Service; it's the Internal Revenue Code that doesn't work.
--Brian Gloe
When I was young, I was taught the story of Jesus and the taxman. The point was that Jesus was good to everyone; so much so that he would even eat with the taxman. The story tells a lot about being good, but it also tells a lot about historical perceptions of the tax collector.
--Christopher Bergin
To collect all the taxes owed -- that is, to close the tax gap - - is an impossible task.
--Berdji Kenadjian
A healthy tax base allows the government to collect the same tax at lower rates. A loophole-ridden tax base is the worst of all worlds because it realizes no revenue, but causes economic damage as taxpayers plan around the tax.
--Calvin H. Johnson
It is fair that each man shall pay taxes in exact proportion to the value of his property; but if we should wait before collecting a tax to adjust the taxes upon each man in exact proportion with every other man, we should never collect any tax at all.
--Abraham Lincoln
Estate Taxes
The idea that some people would pay half of their estate, after some substantial exemptions, to the federal government seems to me entirely appropriate.
--Bill Gates Sr.
[The estate tax is] an act of economic waste which is damaging to all.
--Joseph Schumpeter
Exemption
Old MacDonald had an agricultural real estate tax abatement.
--Anonymous
The exemption of property from taxation is a question of policy and not of power.
--John McLean
Strong considerations of fiscal and social policy view tax exemptions with a hostile eye.
--Frank Murphy
Tax exemption is a privilege derived from legislative grace, not a constitutional right.
--Lapsley W. Hamblen Jr.
I don't know of a single foreign product that enters this country untaxed, except the answer to prayer.
--Mark Twain
You have no authority to impose taxes, tribute, or duty on any of the priests . . . at this house of God.
--Old Testament
The tax-exempt privilege is a feature always reflected in the market price of bonds. The investor pays for it.
--Louis D. Brandeis
I didn't see why the schoolmaster should be taxed to support the priest, and not the priest the schoolmaster.
--Henry David Thoreau
Most philanthropy is tax-motivated. The notion that charity wouldn't be hurt if you eliminated the death tax is absurd.
--William Zabel
Looking backward it is easy to see that the line between the taxable and the immune has been drawn by an unsteady hand.
--Robert H. Jackson
Donors who are only interested in the tax benefits of their gifts may give philanthropy a bad name, but their money still helps.
--Mark Litzler
The real motive behind most private foundations is keeping control of wealth (even while the wealth itself is given away).
--Business Week
Unless . . . savings are exempted from income tax, the contributors are twice taxed on what they save, and only once on what they spend.
--John Stuart Mill
[B]usiness people on charity boards frequently approve decisions that ignore the very sense and insights they use in their own businesses.
--Randy Richardson
Trying to understand the various exempt organization provisions of the Internal Revenue Code is as difficult as capturing a drop of mercury under your thumb.
--Stephen J. Swift
Exemptions from the operation of a tax always create inequalities. Those not exempted must, in the end, bear an additional burden or pay more than their share.
--Stephen J. Field
Just what instrumentalities of either a state or the Federal government are exempt from taxation by the other cannot be stated in terms of universal application.
--Harlan F. Stone
Many nonprofit groups strive for a just and humane life for the people they serve, yet at the same time have people on staff who are eligible for food stamps.
--John Pratt and Sondra Reis
Joseph made it a law over the land of Egypt unto this day, that Pharaoh should have the fifth part; except the land of priests only, which became not Pharaoh's. . . .
--Old Testament
I would suggest the taxation of all property equally whether church or corporation, exempting only the last resting place of the dead and possibly, with proper restrictions, church edifices.
--Ulysses S. Grant
[G]overnment relieves from the tax burden religious, educational, and charitable activities because it wishes to encourage them as representing the highest and noblest achievements of mankind.
--Chauncey Belknap
[T]ax exemption for public charities should be restricted to those areas where the quality or quantity of goods and services that would be produced strictly through market forces is inadequate.
--O. Donaldson Chapoton
Another means of silently lessening the inequality of property is to exempt all from taxation below a certain point, and to tax the higher portions of property in geometrical progression as they rise.
--Thomas Jefferson
